It was rainy and cold this morning, and all I really wanted to do was to drink my coffee, say my prayers, and read a chapter of my favorite book. Part of being a dog owner, however, is that, whether one likes it or not, one must take the dog out for a morning walk. Unlike humans who have ultra-convenient indoor plumbing, dogs have the great outdoors.  And so I threw on a sweater and rain jacket, hooked the dog to the leash, and proceeded into the wet and cool of the day.

After several hundred yards, my dog arrested his gait, formed the customary statuesque defecatory pose and went about the real business of our morning walk.  It was still raining.

I had assumed that, after said “real business” was concluded, my dog would compliantly accompany me back to our nice, toasty home where I could resume my pleasant morning regimen.  My dog, however, had other plans.  He, apparently, was having a grand time in the wet and cold and had no intention whatsoever of reversing our ambulatory course.  A tug-o-war ensued, of course, and I am proud to say that I emerged victorious, albeit barely.  We returned to the house, both us feeling rather dejected.

For a while, my dog sauntered somberly around the house.  I pretended not to notice.  After about ten minutes of pouting, my dog seemed to be over it.  He picked up one of his well-worn tennis balls, brought it to me, and forced his still-moist head into my lap.  This was my dog’s way of saying that he had forgiven me and wanted to get on with it… a golden retriever’s form of reconciliation.  I rubbed his ears, playfully pulled at the drooly tennis ball and gave him a bite of my bagel.  I had forgiven him as well, and I, too, wanted to get on with it.

Oh, were it this easy with humans!  Reconciliation, I mean.  

Humans are made for relationship, with God and with each other. Sometimes our relationships go fairly well.  But not always.  It is inevitable that we have differing ideas, desires, perspectives, inclinations, dreams, and aspirations. When these come into conflict with another’s, it is inevitable that we either hurt or get hurt.  If this has been your experience, please do not conclude that you’re doing something wrong. No matter how in sync you may feel with another, we will always, eventually, hurt and be hurt. And instead of bemoaning that it shouldn’t be like that, we are always given the opportunity to focus our energies instead  on forgiveness and reconciliation. Jesus even tells us as much, “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who have trespassed against us.”

Of course, human-to-human relationships are much more complex than human-to-animal relationships, and often, more profound.  Consequently, the work of reconciliation among humans can be immensely more challenging.  Nonetheless, I wonder… 

I wonder  whether much of the difficulty in becoming reconciled would be eliminated if we were just a bit less prideful. I wonder if, maybe, golden retrievers can teach us something about what it means to forgive.  I wonder if, maybe, we are making it just more complicated than it needs to be.  Perhaps, if we are willing, God really can use simple tools, like tennis balls and bagels, as we learn to forgive and get on with it.

~Father Art